Bromantic ending!

The status of relationships are getting complicated between a man and woman .Well, there was a time when this was the simplest of relationships.

We are in the times of Gay and Lesbian relationships (not that they didn't exist before), but to be open about it like today!

I think all of us will have to accept our slight inclination to the same sex. That doesn't make us Gay/Lesbian for sure.

For all the men who fantasize two women kiss and brooding over a man’s close to perfect physique and to all the kinkiness of the woman wanting to kiss Angelina Jolie or Lady Gaga for that matter, I think it is absolutely normal.

We have started being extremely judgemental about the way we look at people around. I’m sometimes scared to ask my boyfriend out because I have a gang of his best friends exchanging stern looks.

With movies explicitly describing a man- man and woman -woman relationships and having the freedom to talk about it irrespective of the gender, forces one to think so.

But “bromance” is what all wants deep down.

There is no doubt about the concept of "Hole and Pole" when it comes to sex it has to be a man and woman.

But now what is missing in our lives is companionship. In our busy day to day lives after long stressful work there is nothing like a day at the spa with your girl friends or a movie together.

Same goes for the boys to do an alcohol, grill and gossip session at a friend’s place.

 The key point here is not to give a negative vibe or that your emotions should not be misread, as today it is very common that another person of the same sex is attracted to you. I do think twice if a woman is showing any sort of interest in me.

 But time to accept our bromances.

 A man has his counterparts at the gym working out and exchanging diets and protein mixes, Meet up with your other guy friends and their friends too and the next thing you know is that they are the next best friends. Instead of just having a few beers, watching the game and then calling it a night they watch movies together or test drive a new bike.

This way there is no confusion on their inclination. These are clearly men who are straight and men who take time out to holiday with their partners and have romantic dinners but still manage to lift weights go to heavy metal rock shows, play video games which are clearly not your partner’s favourite past time.

 Nothing to worry ladies it is not your birth right to have BFF (best friends forever ) but when it is a man and man the relationship is minus the egos.

The BFF’s shop together, goes for coffees or drinks at the bar in their best possible ensemble ,goes to the spa , share an afternoon baking a muffin, clicking a picture with a perfect pout , airbrushes it and puts it up on “Facebook” to get nothing less than 200 likes.

They watch movies (chic flicks ), attend kitty parties and always are protective about their men who practically give them just the sperm.

Clearly the BFF  hates the guy you are dating and is extremely critical of him. She will spy around him and find all those hidden secrets ( mostly infidelity) and forces you to confront him.

The Girl’s best friend is constantly trying to be you and get all that you have and mould their lives just like yours. 

  Can you imagine getting your boyfriend to work out with you and carry your shopping bags. If at all you manage to convince him you are stuck up with a man who is constantly whining as if you made him paint his nails pink.

More and more communities spring up on the internet for women to find other women with common interests like photography, meditation and travel irrespective of age or marital status; this is definitely trending now.

I would rather travel with a woman and do my shopping-sightseeing- partying regime than end up in the hotel room checking out the bar and casino!!

I still remember in school I made a pact with a good best friend that we should buy a flat in a city and stay together as best friends forever, little did I know that this would be a possible option today.

It is wonderful to see women of today go any extent to live and love themselves keeping their dependency on the second person man/woman to a bare minimum and add a lot of fun and colour to their lives.

That way you have a happy bunch of girlfriends and a happier partner.

And then they all lived happily ever after

A bromantic ending …….

Guests Unwelcome!

This is definitely one of the reasons why I blog. It is my personal venting space. I find extreme peace by doing so and I get so many; who shares similar experiences and cry with me.

I was(was/is conflict still continues) this bitchy, hot, independent successful career girl who lived alone stocked beer in the fridge, ate junk, and ordered a Pepperoni and double cheese pizza for dinner. Friends in stylish clothes, dirty car, and a “don’t mess with me” attitude! that was me in my rented house years back.

Kids were scared to walk past my home. Neighbours never dared to ring the bell.

The caretaker stayed up late to open the gate for me. Nobody would cross my way.

That’s what I thought every Chennai resident was like.

“Never bother, never get bothered.”

Till one fine day after I moved in to a home which I can call my own.

Well It was my new home and according to social norms I had to be a social animal, Approachable and helping. I had to atleast know my neighbours by name so that I could wave out to them and say “Good morning Mr. Sankarnarayan, The summer in Chennai has definitely set in”?

I was this super sweet lady who spoke well to her neighbours, security guards, caretaker. The woman who has her name put up on the block directory. She drives around all by herself, wears fancy clothes works odd hours and yet has time for cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping and many more.

Well all what you give is not what you get all the time.

I have the most annoying unwelcomed guest/”s” ever!!

My Neighbour Mr. Boobalan and his wife ! I have never seen Mr. Boobalan at all. He is always over shadowed by the presence of his wife Mrs. Boobalan. I fondly call her Mrs. Boobs(in thought bubble) and yes Pun definitely intended.

She seemed helpful and projected herself to be this extra helpful neighbour but wait a minute helpful can be annoying too.

She rang the bell one fine Morning at 7.30am ..sounds fine to you ?

Not to me.

I mostly do the second shift for which I need to reach work at 1pm. I get back after a long day of work, cook a full course meal (dinner being my favourite meal) and have my late dinner , watch a movie on the laptop or read a bit and fall asleep. It is not a pleasant experience to wake up at that hour!

She would come in with neighbours from other blocks which to me sound like a neighbour from some “N’th” block who would want to see my home and furniture. These women force their way into the house to comment on everything from the brand of your refrigerator to even a spoon set.

She spots a folded yoga mat. Oh my god you exercise? You are so thin why do you need to exercise. Now am I going to give them the logical reason when the only thing on my mind is rush back and curl up under the fluffy soft comforter?

Here comes the next,

Girls should wake up early and do the household chores .Then it is brings in lot of grace. Well, woman!! Do you understand I’m a man stuck in woman’s body.

I’m not the island girl who waits for her husband to return with his catch!

Moving on……

Oh is that your new TV? We have a bigger one. And I’m sure better options too.

With the next one I blew my top!!!!!

They open the fridge. You don’t drink the fresh milk. Tetra pack is unhealthy and expensive. I’ll ask the milkman to drop off a few packets for you as well.

Is this real?(pinches herself)

Well I had to rephrase my sentences and give a trailer of my bitchy side to put an end to this!

Being around is appreciable but entering your personal space is a tricky affair. There is no need for your neighbour to know your personal day to day schedule, what do you eat, what are your monthly expenses!

They don’t decide your timings, chart out your guest list or tweak you lifestyle.

You have to be firm but kind enough and put across the message in the best possible manner. I told her I’m serious !don’t mess with me attitude that I do things my way and I like it done that way And interference of any sort shall not be entertained .

For that sake please understand that what I mean is that when you are unwelcome it is an understatement. Now I wait for a glimpse of Mrs. Boobs and she is not to be seen around! Do I miss her? Well no!

Characters I would like to meet……

I was never a fan of fiction but since childhood I believed fairy tales existed and fantasies were true.

In my whole lifespan, I have come across umpteen numbers of characters and yet there are certain characters I wish I could meet…

These men have always had a special place in my heart and have always been on my lists of characters I would like to meet.

To start with; the youngest heroic iconic Tintin.

He was never my definition of the most handsome man around .He was boyish and adventurous. My love for travel and an eye for detail always attracted me to him. I was always jealous of Snowy for having got to spend a lot of time with him. But their camaraderie was the highlight of the series.

I would like to meet Tintin and explore Tibet all over again .Now a sly part of my character feels that I might leave Tintin for Yeti if I happen to meet him on my Tibetan expedition. It’s a monstrous creature. Yes, He is huge, hairy and hunch backed. But his heart can even melt the snow.

Captain Archibald Haddock the world’s most respected alcoholic. Women (in general) do not want their men to drink smoke or abuse. Such cases don’t exist too but Captain Haddock still manages to snatch all the attention. I guess a man with a history is desirable by any woman. His cynical way of looking at Life would have made him a survivor in today’s world. This foul mouthed sailor is definitely one of the top 5 characters I would like to meet.

Moving to yet another character, that is just not in my list of men I would like to do more than “just meet” is Joey Tribbiani.

Look into the eyes of Mr. Joseph Tribbiani you would know what is in his mind. Not a difficult task, as it has to be either food or sex.

We also have a common love for quality meat and food is always on my mind.When I was young I had a Hugsy too.That tops is all.

Talk about food I just cannot forget my very dear own Jughead Jones.

From one who loves women as much as his food to one who solely loves his food, Juggie Jones .Girls make him uncomfortable and he resorts to sarcasm, comedy and food for defense.

Jack sparrow .We are not talking nonsense here. Mr. Sparrow has a goal, is focused  mystery surrounds him, rough on the outside sweet as syrup on the inside

Not to conclude with some romance.The scene where belle returns to her heart broken beast and tells him how much she loves him.Yes the beauty and the beast. I m sure we keep meeting our favorite people in our day to day life its  just to keep our eyes open to identify them....

Go Catch Him Red Handed!!!!

Go Catch Him Red Handed!!!!

You are in a perfect relationship and it is an accepted statute in today’s world that you tell him what is obligatory and you are so well aware that what he tells you is always rephrased.

Rephrasing is the safest form to steer clear from “being caught”.

I have always had a lot of married friends telling me … “Please don’t tell my wife that I said this”

My answer always remains the same.

If your wife shouldn’t know then you just shouldn’t do!

That has left quite a hard prick on your conscience, hasn’t it?

When he rephrases the truth we need to watch out for his words and body language

“I’ve already left the club”, “I’m on my way”. When your partner tells you this harmless lie it’s a smart detective grin on your face.

The one who lies doesn’t realize that the one whom you just lied to has just imagined the worst.

If he gives you a question instead of an answer to your question, beware and be aware that he is just plainly lying.

If this is coming next, babe, you are in deep trouble! “Do you think I will do something like that”?

Being vague about a place, person, or object is yet another sign of a manipulator. I’m out with friends could just be an awesome threesome. I know her from before could also mean they were way too close.

"By the way…, if you think I’m lying I’m not.” I’m sure many of you have heard this before and know what this means.

 "I know you think I'm lying, but…"

Watch out for that BUT

Tell me "Why would I do that?"

This is the dangerous pause for making up a bigger better convincing story. This conversation could go to an argument which would start with how dare you. Or I just don’t want to discuss this.

This is all so funny playing Tom and Jerry in relationships as long as it stays harmless and charming

All you girls just stop reading and go catch him RED handed…!!!!

Lessons my mother said SKIP!!!!

It is Every Mother's right to keep her daughter away from the evil that she saw in the world and it is the dream of every rebellious daughter to see what you are not allowed to see.

Keeping aside a lot of things that a typical mother wouldn’t let her daughter do..... My mother did not teach me one thing and she had a good reason for it too...
She never taught me how to COOK.

As a child I could not even roast a papad, make maggi or omelets like how my close friends did. Every teenager knew how to make jellies, French fries and cup cakes and I was always the spoilt daughter without siblings having a fancy life...

Till one day I moved out of my home to be in a city to have a home of my own, a dream job selling exotic luxury products, wear a suit to work and have a car to drive you around and of course a Kitchen like the one little red riding hood's grandmother had.
I had a three burner gas stove, a microwave cum grill, a mixer, refrigerator and a conventional oven.
I took up the challenge of trying out dishes that I found exotic and seemed difficult to cook. Recipes were like a Math sum. The more data given the easier it was and exotic it tasted and looked. Apart from an elaborate Malayali vegetatian -Brown rice , “thoran” and “mezhukupurathiyathu” with “kachia moru” I could proudly come out with Kerala style fish and chicken fried and curried. And the most amazing prawn biriyani and Crab roast.

It was Christmas and I wanted to bake like anyone or maybe better than anyone else. I wanted to bake cakes for my loved ones on their special days. I mastered the recipe of the best white pound cake. I made peanut butter cookies, scones, shortbread cookies, lemon tarts.
I developed a sense to smell the curry and say if the meat was done or the bread was baked.

I remember food that I had tried out from different people like my mother makes the best of fish curry and my grandmother certain tomato chutney. An old Paying guesthouse had this awesome onion chutney.
Tamil nadu is where I have tasted the best “rasam” ever. A kerala Christian home, made the best “pidi” and chicken curry.

Some nice sweet dishes as well like the tender coconut pudding, cashew pudding and the caramel custard.
The best part of setting up a kitchen is to have the containers color coded, learn to read the dish care instructions, to have Microwave friendly dishes. In the process I have burnt a plastic container in the microwave. I still can’t forget the fuming microwave. I laughed and quoted Sylvia Plath.
"To annihilate the world by annihilation of one's self is the deluded height of desperate egoism. The simple way out of all the little brick dead ends we scratch our nails against.... I want to kill myself, to escape from responsibility, to crawl back abjectly into the womb."I always wondered how it would have been to put my head in the oven instead of the not so microwave friendly dish.

Shopping for traditional utensils which I feel will soon get extinct...The coconut grater for a start… to red colors plates long forks
Choosing Meat, fish, vegetables.....To de vein to sauté to grill to bake. It’s always good to cook for yourself. It’s nice to eat what you like, add less of what you don’t like, keep a check on the fat oil and salt intake. It’s a lot cheaper and healthier.

You can always be the favorite chef amongst your friends and show off your culinary skills. You are never out of topic with elders you are busy sharing your recipes with them. I eat 2 meals out continuously and I miss my cooking the third time I do so.

I’m sure you must be wondering all this while why my mother would not have allowed me to be appreciated by friends, assent me to get compliments or even let me try to cook or bake like her.

She was the most amazing cook amongst all the aunts. It unfailingly became her responsibility to spend hours in the kitchen while others spend time dressing up for a function at home. Any relative who walks into my home even at midnight expected and got their elaborate spread on the dining table. Every member in the family relates to the midnight craving for sugar and we had our list of Paal rawa and coconut burfi. We were allowed to choose. One wanted the “dosa” with butter some without and the kids wanted them in shapes. I wanted the special tomato chutney, father with the chilli powder chutney and grandmother wouldn’t eat it without the “sambar”. And we never really cared how she liked it.

We find an extra lump in the vegetable, mismatch in the plates served, (I don’t know about others) but I could sense that it was food made to fill our stomach and just because it needed to be done.

The food made with passion reflects passion in taste, presentation, warmth.

Next time you put anything in your mouth wait a second and think if the chef was under compulsion or it was a manifest of passion …:-)

The Man in Yellow Skirt!!

This is a dedication to a woman stuck in a man's body.But girls forgive me for this usage because im a proud woman myself all i meant to say is that he has everything except for manliness...

His birth was a mistake of God but God never had regrets because he wanted to make people associated with him Stronger bolder and understand how blessed and graced they are compared to the man who has stooped to earth and below....

The lessons taught by "it" ok pardon me for calling him and it as to call him "him" i will have to take a conscious effort.

By god's grace the weapon given to this creature is an ability to look deep into your eyes and not tell the truth and also swear by the mother which is a regular without feeling guilty.

According to my analysis it is different from human beings in a certain way.
Physically this creature will not have the specific organs which make him a man...
Heart because there is no levels of sensitivity
Brains - because they think they will never be detected
Lungs and Liver  -  can be subjected to any levels of drinking and smoking.

On the Mental front these creatures can be called mind lepers as they do not realise how insensitive they are and laughs when other human beings weep.

The only negative review is that it tends to chicken around people who can be of any benefit....they also gives in between human beings in skins of handsome men.
They go to schools colleges and work...
At school they stick around small innocent girls to get work done as they do not have brains to do it themselves ...goes on from college to work place...
they shamelessly ask for forgiveness to cover their faces.
They do not live my moments but they live by time.....contradicting my blog in many not many but all ways...

Never restrainyourself from these creatures as they are like eunuchs ...
they are lucky for u as you become stronger and bolder.but take it in the right sense.dont confuse these for men ...
Men are different ....these IT's are different....
Respect it ,because they are born like that....behave like that....

Its a rare chance that u come accross such creatures cherish the moment you spend with IT